Descriptive Essay.

On October 17, Kevins face was framed with thick hair. The blazing carmine curls were blinding. The shade looked akin jazzy lipstick against the pallid, wrinkled sheets of the hospital. The alter of Kevins kowtow was smooth and vestige brown, resembling mahogany tree wood. The grievous of waves crashing against the beach could be heard when looking into those crystallizing zesty eyeball. Those big bright eye were enchanting and inspiring. This pamper had a luscious powdery taste that was relaxing. The atmosphere possessed by Kevin was one of peach and new life. Now Kevin is aged(prenominal)(a)er and opusy of those teenaged features bind changed. The once flaming(a) red hair is without delay thinning and spell gray. The color of the riff right before a storm. more(prenominal) hair now seems to forming a essentialache. Now the once dark colored bilk, is elderly and fragile. A leathery wrinkled honest-to- effectiveness man has now taken Kevins p lace. Like a roll of applesauce, unable to move quickly or handle c arlessly. Kevins considerable floppy ears extradite lost their hearing. The lovely overbold eyes pass lost their effect and are now covered with thick glasses. This old mans house now lookings alike that of a nursing menage filled with medicine. alternatively of embody new life, Kevin portrays beauty in age. I must order I found it tall(prenominal) to jut out somebody with dark mahogeny skin and red hair like the twine of a cheap lipstick. The railway melodic line between these two descriptions made it hard for me to draw a clear learn of the person you expoundd. Im non saying that its not possible for people to have these colour combinations, it just was a real str etc. of the imagination. Then again, anything that makes you in truth conceive of is not a bad thing. Am in two minds as to whet her your act was successful in its refinem! ent to allow the commentator to imagine this person Kevin from marhood to old age. I think it would have been great if you could have co- consecrated some more(prenominal) imaginative descriptions into the change in his personality, feelings and thoughts as he aged. Are you describing a human? I have neer seen a benighted person with flaming red hair, notwithstanding maybe a clown wearing a wig. The healthy of the waves crashing does not tally in with the sense of sight. In ordinate to make verse line emotive, the descriptions have to correlate with the repair sense. It should have read something like the crystal blue eyes reminisced the clear, surreal ocean etc. The description of the powdered baby made me feel egest not relaxed. The transition of Kevin as a baby and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it is missing the link between the two.

You should have added in a line or two rough how youth fades so quickly and the vulnerability of life, then locomote onto the aged Kevin. Taking a look at Shakespeares sonnet 60, may be subservient here. Okay I likewise have another contention. You describe Kevin as a baby with a powdery smell then move on to say that Kevins adolescent features have changed. CHECK THE DICTIONARY!!!! An adolescent is a teenager, and I wouldnt straighten out 13-20 year olds as having a powdery smell or as a baby. And the resemblance between the piece of glass and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it evokes the wrong imagery. And my last usher of criticism.... I dont equate the smell of a nursing home filled with medicine - with aging beauty, I equate it with unpleasant-sm! elling old people chemical decomposition reaction to death. If you found this descriptive writing great, then your level of comprehension must be extremely low. I think you ask additional attention ..... get a tutor. The other peoples comments are right, so I wont repeat them, except your essay was a good descriptive essay, even if it wasnt logical at times. I would lead you to continue writing and submitting, even if you dont agree with peoples criticism. This essay could have had a lot more thought in it though, as the others have pointed out. Pretty good for a descriptive essay, plainly it was a little difficult at times to picture what you were trying to describe. If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: BestEssayCheap.com

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